P s y c h o l o g y


Over the years I have learnt several powerful lessons. These are my top 24 lessons (one for every year of my life). Although there are many more I predict that these will change as life goes by — that is the beauty it.

I can't take credit for all these lessons, because humans are probably the only species capable of learning through other people. There are several people who have had an influence on the way I think and act.

1. Words are powerful
You may think that words are just that — words. But you will never know what the impact of your words will be on other people. Words have the power to uplift or destroy. Use them wisely.

2. The power is always in your hands
Negative and unpleasant stuff happens to the best of us. Yes, some of us face a lot more adversity, but we you can always choose how you are going to respond to it. You may not be able to change your situation, but you can choose how you are going to react.

3. People want to heard
All humans have one thing in common — we want to be heard. We want to know that people hear us; that we are important enough and that what we say, mean something to other people.

4. Failure is a great teacher
It is very difficult to stand up after life knocked you down several times. Failure is a normal part of life and often teach you far more than success. Use every hardship as a chance to learn something new. You will grow and improve and it will make you a stronger human being.

5. Don't live too cautiously
Life only comes by once in a lifetime. Don't prevent yourself from doing something because you are scared. Let yourself go and enjoy opportunities that comes your way. Getting out of your comfort zone opens up possibilities you never knew existed.

6. The sun will rise tomorrow
No matter what happened, you always have a chance to start over. You can start afresh and do things differently. Your past has as much control over the present as you give it.

7. Be grateful
It is so easy to be focused on what we don't have, rather than focusing what we do have. Gratitude brings perspective. Remember, there is always people who are in similar or far worse conditions than your own. Be grateful for what you have.

8. Never stop thinking
It is easy to go through life without thinking for yourself. Always be informed. Question people and information. Don't let other people's attitudes and beliefs hold any power over you just because of who they are or because you are afraid to challenge them.

9. Be present
Life is a series of moments and often we are so focused on the next moment that we forget about the current one. Right now is the only moment you definitely have. Make the best of it.

10. Dream big
If you don't know where you are going, you will never get there. Don't be afraid to dream big. Nothing great has ever bee achieved by people who didn't dream big. Yes, for some stuff your chances are probably one in a million to succeed. But why can't you be that one in a million?

11. Live your passion
We spend more than 40 years of our lives working. If you are unhappy at your job that is going to be a long 40 years. If you do what you love, you will see how possibilities will unfold. Remember it doesn't matter what you achieved if there was no pleasure in achieving it. You are only fooling yourself. Have the courage to take a leap of faith.

12. Do your best
Can you honestly say at the end of every day or task that you did your very best? Always deliver your best. Excellence is the best way of silencing your critics. Nobody can criticize the best, so rise above your circumstances and limitations.

13. Happiness is a choice
Happiness is a state of mind. If you wait for your circumstances to be perfect in order for you to be happy, you are going to wait forever. Happiness is a choice to not let hardships get you down. We can use all that energy wasted on pessimism and do something positive.

14. Giving is far more important than receiving
The best gifts in life are the gifts that we give. Gifts doesn't have to be material ones. A smile, a making a friend a cup of coffee and asking somebody how their day went are all ways of giving. It will bring you far more joy to know you have made a small impact.

15. You are what you believe
Your mind is a powerful tool. It dictates everything you do and experience. Constantly be aware of that and realize that it determines your destiny. Negative thoughts and worrying are is a waste of energy. It will only hold you back.

16. Trouble will not last
You may think that your life is ending and that everything is falling apart, but trouble is never permanent. Yes, the effects of trouble may last forever, but the trouble itself will not. By believing that you will be okay, trouble loses its power over you.

17. Never give up
You may fail dismally at something a few hundred times, but by giving up, you are telling yourself that you are not strong enough. You may not succeed at a certain point in time, but it happens for a reason. When you fail, stand up and try again.

18. You only need a little courage
Most of us are afraid to do stuff or take chances out of fear of rejection. But often we only need a few seconds of courage. Tell yourself: "For the next 20 second I will have courage. I just need to take a chance for 20 seconds." Try it and see the difference it makes.

19. Choose between being right and being happy 
Don't sweat the small stuff. Sometimes we need to decide to let go of frivolous and petty issues. This choice is this: Do you want to fight and be right or do you just want to be happy? Avoid confrontation that is not necessary.

20. You can manage your feelings
It is impossible to choose your feelings (hate, love, jealousy, etc.) and you never have to apologise for it. What you can do, however, is to manage it. You simply can't act out on every emotion you have. It is of vital importance to think about what you are feeling very carefully, and then to decide on an appropriate action. Just following your emotions blindly can lead to you making a lot of enemies.

21. Life is not fair 
As children we were always taught to be nice to our friends and that good deeds are always rewarded. But unfortunately that is not how life works. Real life is not fair. People will walk over you and I can guarantee you will be disappointed by people. One of the biggest challenges is to accept this. Know that it will happen and deal with it.

22. Accept change
I hate change. I hate saying goodbye or leaving people I care about behind. I hate starting something new. And I know I am like so many other people: I am afraid of what the future holds. I am afraid that things will be worse than what I left. One of the most difficult things in life is to learn to live with it. Don't fight the inevitable; embrace it.

23. Don't block you own blessings
Sometimes we inherently feel unworthy. We think we are not good enough and that we do not deserve to achieve something, fall in love or build positive relationships and therefore we block the positive events that might have happened to us simply because we push it away. Believe you are good enough and open yourself to possibilities.

24. Trust your gut
Everybody has that little voice inside them that whispers to you that something is either right or wrong. This may not be a scientific way of "knowing" thing, but it can safe you a lot of trouble and heartache. Often when you think something is wrong, there is something wrong.And even if all is well it can't hurt investigating. Yes, you should not be doubtful about everything and everyone, but just be aware of that little voice called your gut.

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